this is so much better

derick is my bestfriend,because he sits on my front porch,at 3 am and lets me cry. he hugs me and listens and tells me how great I am.

we started talking about jenny. and the tears started and wouldn't stop. the truth is,I miss her,very much so. i told her everything,and confided in her. it was really hard to just walk away but I had to do it.however,I haven't talked to her at all and I need to. i owe her an explanation and i owe myself some time of getting over things.

she lied to me,she hurt people,and she hurt me.

but sometimes I just miss her so much. i miss talking to her endlessly,and hearing her voice. having someone who understands me completely. I guess what makes a lot of it all so hard,is that I trusted her.

its extremely hard for me to do that.

tonight was the first time i honestly sat down and cried about it. and now the pain in my chest is gone.i hope it stays that way.

i have to sleep now.

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Julianna but everyone calls me Julie. I live in southern illinois. I'm 24. I do hair aka cosmetologist and watch a lot of re-runs.music is my life and it makes me happy. my friends are my family.I'm full of useless information. i'm extremely opinionated,blunt,and honest. small talk is stupid and I have no use for it.I'm a big girl,always have been and I like who I am. if you have a problem with "fat people" you can go fuck yourself and bite my ass. however,I am a nice person for the most part and I just have no time for stupidity. sarcasm is my middle name. we only live once so don't take life so seriously.

golden girls,hello kitty,going to shows,st.louis,houston,piercings,mad tv,dane cook,my momma,my brotha,get togethers,target,christmas,my birthday,halloween,the state,reno 911,warm vanilla sugar,bottled water,singing,uncle buck,goonies,seinfeld,etc.

smoking,drugs,stupid people,eggs mixed with other foods(like omlettes),the word"yuns",jackasses,smelly people,dirty finger nails,the radio,country music,most of tv,etc.

low,rilo kiley,they might be giants,sufjan stevens,pedro the lion,motion city soundtrack,damien rice,lou barlow,jimmy eat world,mobius band,ted leo and RX,ben folds,ratatat,iron and wine,that dog,the urge,spoon,death cab for cutie,etc.

Check me out!